Updates from April, 2012 Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts

  • le joufflu et big dream 10:48 am on April 22, 2012 Permalink | Reply
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    to inspire or be inspired 

    to write or to not write is the same as to die or not to die for me (literally)…when you wrote something,you often expect people will like it as much as you do,but…the real question is whether their way of thinking or judging is the same way as you are..for example, are Braun Buffel and Burberry different?some will answer, “no,they are the same. they’re branded goods” and some will answer “they are different.they even spelled in a different way”..okay,those people who answer it this way certainly deserve a punch in their face..

    okay..i’m way out of topic here..^^

    coming back to my issue here..for a writer/blogger like me (err..do i deserve to be called as writer???blogger???hurm..NO,I am NOT),when you wrote something,it either turn out as something refreshing,something cool,something that is pleasantly suprising OR something that is controversial (not in a good way),something that is not worth of waiting for it (the page) to load which approximately taking 0.5 second…

    THE WAR WITHIN MYSELF

    i’m having doubt most of the time when i started to write (and it goes the same with this post too).what i’m going to write?is this too much of exposure?will this be alright?will this be fun to read?sometimes,this argument will end up in ‘no-post-for-today’ situation.anyway,i’m just a woman..err..not that i’m old enough to be call woman..just like britney said ‘i’m not a girl but not yet a woman’…okay..for a teenage girl like me,things that inspire me to write are quite funny though…

    THINGS THAT INSPIRE ME/THE TIME WHEN I’M INSPIRED TO WRITE

    1. my friend
    -okay,this might need some explanation..no matter when this friend has hurt my feelings or make me happy, at the end of the day,i will end up with bunch of stories or event to share..
    -and when this other friend wrote something cool in his/her blog,i will end up being inspired to write more or to write something if it is not as cool as my friend’s post,at least,it i will write something good..and that’s enough reason for me to write.

    2. my feeling
    -regardless to keep my sanity,i also write to express and share my feelings.even if not many will response,or in this case,only my bff (^^,) that response to my post,i’m happy that at least there is someone that will read the post and know what i have been through.

    3. when i’m having menses and my emotion is not that stable
    -okay,this is quite funny for me..but i do notice that whenever i’m having menses and all those problems start to accumulate and the only thing that is letting me to express myself is through this blog..and i do admit that there’s difference in the post that i wrote when i’m having menses and when i’m not having menses..and it seems that i wrote better when i’m having menses.

    4. to inspire
    -even if i only has small probability of inspiring others,i am actually trying my best to write something..something that even it is not the best,at least it is better,and..even if it is not better than others,it is good enough..and even if it is not good enough,at least i’m being honest with myself and i try to not be a hypocrite,and continue to write something that is related to me,something that is me..

    AND…

    there are many other reasons that i couldn’t put into words here..this post is actually a small gratitude to everyone that has inspire me,no matter how small or how big it is,even the smallest contribution actually has put me where i am today.and actually to my parents that always taught me everything since i was little until..here i am..as big as i can be *laugh*….

    WHATEVER IT IS

    the most important thing that i have learnt is that to never stop writing..

    Finish each day and be done with it,you have done what you could;
    Some blunders and absurdities have crept in;forget them as soon as you can.
    Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.

    • -Ralph Waldo Emerson —

    right on,Ralph..

    p/s:it is not that my blog is good enough to inspire,just try to share my thoughts

     
  • le joufflu et big dream 7:43 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply
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    in the verge of breakdown 

    i do think that it isn’t fair for me if i said that i never smile here,in kmpp..i really think that i have done kmpp a real injustice if i said that i never felt happy being here,try to study hard while pursuing my dream..

    BUT

    i am indeed a pathetic human being if i also lied to myself,telling that i have never been hurt here.it is also the biggest lie i have ever commit if i said that i never burst out in tears while i’m here.

    RIGHT NOW

    my heart hurt so much that even tearing up will never heal it.what have i felt,what i am feeling right now is something new to me.yes,if some people ask me,are you a cry-baby?yes..i would say yes.it isn’t that i’m being a coward,unable to share my feeling with others,it isn’t that i have never tried to tell others what i have been feeling.

    FOR ME

    rather than hurting someone else,i rather hurt my feeling.rather than seeing others cried,i rather crying myself.rather than seeing tears bulking on their eyes,i rather bloated in the next morning with eye-bag under my eyes.rather than telling a hurtful truth,i rather lie to myself,keep the truth to myself.rather than showing others my eyes filled with tears,i rather crying in the bathroom,crying without any sound that it hurt my heart so much.rather than seeing others feeling uneasy,uncomfortable around me,i rather filled myself with all those unbearable feelings until it ‘choke’ me.

    IT ISN’T THAT

    i’m trying to show everyone how good i am,how patient i am.it just that what i have did in order to see others smiling without any insecurities. because i knew how hurt it is when you are hurt,i didn’t want others to encounter what i have encountered,i didn’t want others to feel something that will break their heart into pieces.i’m not being holy here,just want to share how i felt.that’s all..i might ended up pilling up all those unbearable feelings,but it worth it seeing them smile.that’s just how i am.a typical heroic act that not many people understand but i bet there are many who would have done the same.

     
    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 7:48 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      love this!!! seeee my yuhanis is back!! to compare your posts with mine mcm langit dgn bumi. i wrote silly things u posted something so meaningful. bak kata org blog x berfaedah. ok la u inspire me to write smtg like this too in future. maybe about my crush?? hu la la

      • haniclover 8:00 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hukhukhuk..i’m still lacking la..don’t say that..actually,honestly,you are the one who inspires me to write again taw..kalau x,mmg dh lama this blog will be left with nothing to read from it…oh!!!!please write it..can’t wait to read it…who said blog xberfaedah???let me punch them in their face…!!!!!

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 7:52 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      don’t breakdown yet!!! Those people do not deserve your tears la!! Just few days more yuhanis!!! Hwaaaiting!

      • haniclover 8:02 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        thanks love for your encouraging words..i promise i’ll stay strong….you are right,they didn’t worth a bottle of clinique that i might have to buy if i cry again…it going to cost me like my monthly allowance ^^

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 8:06 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      i forgot you’re using clinique. pheewwwwit hehe. i’m using eversoft je. sbb dia ada satu jenis je so i dont hv to bother myself with those toner, moisturizer bla bla pemalas gila patut la muka banyak biji. hehe. oh ramai yg ckp blog sy x berfaedah tau. mereka ialah, saya darab 100000. Heee. u can’t wait to read my post? you’re too kind sweetie pie.

      • haniclover 8:09 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hey..just kidding la..how can me,someone that is soooooo a cheapskate (bak kata best friend sy tuh…fariza azrina),can buy a bottle of clinique???neutrogena je lah..hehehe..hey,ur skin is better than mine…seriously…i’m not that kind,i’m just being honest…i really cant wait for ur next post..hahaha..if u said it urself,it wasn’t count

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 8:13 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      oh yess neutrogena!!! Still mahal la! hehe. eversoft RM6 smtg2 je taaau hahahaha cheapskate & pemalas tahap gaban. i can’t wait for my next post too but i’m suppose to study nooow!!!!! aiyarrrrkkk u know my lecturer said whoever get C and below she’ll call out our names! scarrrrry! tp still x berganjak dari dpn lappy ni. masalah betul

      • haniclover 8:17 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hahahaha..but i barely bought it every month though..tambah2 study week ni,its not that i use it everyday..eh,if im the one that keep you dpan lappy,im sorry..it’s ok..you can go study now..no more post tonight..hehehe..dh xdak smething happen,so,no thing can inspire me right now..hehehe..

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 8:30 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      ala sedihnya i dont inspire u. eh? tiba-tiba pulak haha

      • haniclover 9:12 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        eh???why u said that???

      • haniclover 9:14 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        not that laaaa…hish2..dont think like that..i didnt mean it..just afraid that u might xstudy,asyik bca blog sy yg xberfaedah ni..n one more thing,takot bnyk sgt post hari ni..smpai 3 post..kang nnti,u r the one that will get bored kn???? ^^

  • le joufflu et big dream 9:02 am on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply
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    5 days to go 

    been counting days,hours,minutes,seconds and even milliseconds..actually just finished packing all my stuff yesterday..the only things left are 4 baju kurung,few tees,trousers and books..

    the red bag is full of tees and trousers + jeans,the blue bag is full of baju kurung…

    and this is my mini-station..hehehe..actually this is where i sat and study while listening to music..

    and this is the messiest place..where i put everything here..from books,mags,files, to my make up stuff..LOL

    and this is..quite shabby eyh???this is where i slept for the past 10 months…looks pathetic but just bear with it…LOL

    and this last picture..i have been fighting with myself whether i’m going to reveal it or not..this is quite a shameful picture..for those who’s viewing this post,please ignore it after 0.05 second you saw this..o my God..after this,i’m pretty sure all those mothers out there will never want to have an in-law like me..but please do trust me..i’m not usually like this..just that,just few days left..have no energy to spare rather than to study and packing up..

    so,that’s all the pictures i have..now i just have that much amount of pride to spare…can believe that i’m going to upload this..for the sake of reality..then..this is it..

    p/s:sorry to my friend that actually i promised her to post this yesterday but my broadband is being a *****..

     
    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 5:45 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      Haha this is what we called room! actually i love the messy one like this!!! and banyaknya barang yg nk kena pack and i noticed a sweater hanging there! lawaa. bravo yuhanis you hv make up stuffs i don’t have any!! haha love the butterfly hanger too ^^ and the dinding so classic. overall i love this! two thumbs up!

      • haniclover 6:00 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hahahaha…the dinding part,i do agree..classic with all the scribble on there,formulae and all that..just books left..with the small table,duvet and small standing fan..that’s all..hehehe..even all the baju kurung and tees only took me like 20 minutes to pack it up..so,the rest maybe 15 and half minutes..hikhikhik..kidding..

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 7:35 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      wah cepatnya. i hate packing!! mine will take at least 38127373 hours to finish. hehe. you’re so good in everything there is nooooo way your mom-in-law will not going to like u 😉

      • haniclover 7:48 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hey…i’m not that good la…hehehe…eyh,i have not have any in-laws YET la..hikhikhik…sometimes,it is better to take time while doing something rather than rushing it…there’s a saying ‘take your time and you will appreciate everything and everyone around you’

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 7:50 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      feel like u punch me on my face with your words there. hehe ouch!

      • haniclover 7:57 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hey,you knew it wasn’t my intention right????erm..how would i put these into words???hurmm..it is better to pack up and taking hours and did the packing perfectly rather than taking just minutes but then you might forget to pack up something and left it in your room..and ended up kena siku dgn parents..kn???

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 8:04 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      haha actually i misunderstood your comment just now. i thought u r referring it to marry, marry part. hehehe sowwiieeee

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 8:10 pm on April 21, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      heee my pleasureeeee!!! =) that’s my girl

  • le joufflu et big dream 10:18 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply
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    for those who always listen to my grumble 

    just try to be positive,optimist for the first time(i’m always grumble…being a grumpy and bitter person suits me)..actually,just wanted to share a poem given to me by one of my besties in kmpp,fakhrul islam….

    Ballerina In The Breeze

    springs brings along your flair,
    and there you dance in each blow,
    trip, till the air stand still,
    and the wings applaud for more

    again comes the blow and the dance,
    and there goes a scent in each blow,
    flow, till my senses are all yours,
    and now i am closer to you

    twist with the scent, and swirl,
    and busy bees will finally freeze,
    closer, till you are next to me,
    oh ballerina in the breeze

     
  • le joufflu et big dream 3:42 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply
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    things that annoys me 

    how do you feel when you are trying to get your beauty sleep,then,someone starts to ramble out of the blue..it’s like one of those moments when something that doesn’t compatible happened..like when you are wearing a Gucci long dress with Coach flats..like when you are wearing Fendi sunglasses and it’s pouring like crazy…it is so despicable..it’s like out of the world (in a bad way)…

    me,being an angel (there’s holy above my head..hahaha),try not to scream..just give a heavy ‘sigh’ and try to continue sleeping while covering my ears..then,they start to arrange their books,cleaning their study table and all that..okay,that was so nice to see them cleaning and try to put all the books in the box..but WHY?????all of the time that they have,it is when i’m trying to sleep????of all time~~~~

    it’s not like i’m really angry with them…(or maybe i am)..it just that..please don’t do that while i’m trying to sleep..i hope they knew that if we’re in states right now,i might sue them for disturbing me while i’m sleeping..because i used to read this from somewhere..this guy sue his neighbour 1 million just because the neighbour snores that disturb him from sleeping..now..what bout those who slam their books into the box while cleaning????5 million maybe???hehehehe…

     
    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 9:38 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      You should sue them!! What kind of people is that?? aiyaaaa lansung x reti nk respect orang. Next time if they’re sleeping you sing out loud. haha

      • haniclover 9:42 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        i think my voice is too beautiful to annoy them..nnti makin tidur plak..anyway..hurm..lumrah alm..whatever they did,they’re still my roommate… 😉

        • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 12:14 am on April 20, 2012 Permalink

          ye la i know tapi fikir la jgk org tgh tidur kn. but actually i pernah dgr the same story as this. my ex-housemate dulu cite yg ex-housemate sy yg dulu tu pindah rumah tgh2 malam buta. sampai dia kena keluar tidur kt ruang tamu. and my ex-roomate sy yg dulu pn mcm tu jgk. dtg pindah pukul 2 pagi!! gila ke ape.

        • haniclover 12:20 am on April 20, 2012 Permalink

          the one that dtg pkul 2 pagi is like a crappy nonsense pnya keje..why 2 pg???hello.don’t tell me that she’s not from malaysia..she clearly didnt set her watch based on gmt timeline..

      • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 12:24 am on April 20, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        she’s from pluto. lupa nak ckp td. hahahaha stupid minded people mcm tu la

        • haniclover 12:36 am on April 20, 2012 Permalink

          hehehehe..owh…she’s from pluto??then she better just stay there..is she trying to invade earth???????

      • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 12:44 am on April 20, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        yea i guess so. luckily she’s not staying in the house anymore. hey bilik sy kosong 😉 nk join? 😀

        • haniclover 12:51 am on April 20, 2012 Permalink

          count me in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *scream*

  • le joufflu et big dream 4:38 pm on April 18, 2012 Permalink | Reply
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    when will it is going to be better???? 

    i’m feeling like a frizzer now…hahahah…first of all,math paper 1 just ended this morning..i do feel relieved but only for that it has ended.i’m not relieved thinking of how i answering the paper…right now i’m feeling like going to beg forgiveness from all mathematicians around the world,dead or alive,i’m sorry for being a disgrace and disrespectful towards mathematics.after this,i swear i’ll treat math better.i swear.

    NOT ONLY THAT

    i also swear to at least read one english novel per month…o Lord..now i knew that i’m just an average.both in conversation or writing..err..can i say this..i think i speak better english than writing in english..how can that be?????now i’m feeling like a scum..or else..i’ll write to ministry of education to change how us (matric student) will answer the essay..through our blog…can?????or cannot???hehehehe..now i do sound like a real scum,pathetic human being…

    THE ONLY GREAT THINGS THAT HAPPEN TODAY….

    while waiting to enter the exam room,i sat on the corridor..waiting,and waiting nervously to answer math. but thennnn….drum roll please…..Mr Lim,my witty and handsome and sweet and just do imagine yourself the rest of his good points beside having a master degree in math….just walk pass where i was sitting and smile and nod at me..as if he’s giving me a good luck wish..o God,now i’m gonna faint not for the math paper await,but Mr Lim..and that senior i was talking bout the other day,our eyes met..hahah..but then,that is the only progress today… ^^

    MY WORDS FOR…

    MR LIM : please don’t smile at me while i wait to enter the exam room,it’ll just increase my heart rate…

    THAT SENIOR : just don’t think the other way around.just want to be friend..not more than that.a loser like
    me just need a cool person like you to be noticed by others..hehehhee ^^

    p/s : another math paper waiting this monday.. *shivering*

     
    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 9:36 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      aaaaaarghhh you really make me feeeel curious to see that mr lim okay! just see not meet! aiyaaaa in my dream la kn… with all of his qualities u mentioned he’s definitely my dream man now.!!

      • haniclover 9:39 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        kan?????how can i’m not attracted to him regardless he’s already married…have a son..o mai god….i better control myself now…..actually he’s not that handsome or what..he’s just cute and….all that..heheheh…aduh..*faint x9999*

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 9:52 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      i knooowww!!! all chinese are cutee! why laaaaaaaaaaa????!?! there’s something about their face.. buat rasa x puas tengok ahaks

      • haniclover 9:55 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hahahahaha..yea right…eh,is ur cmment ada kaitan with other chinese guy that we both know?????hehehhe…comel la…..

      • haniclover 9:56 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        yea right…by any chance ur cmment ni ada cnnection with other chinese guy we both may know???????

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 10:00 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      hahaha ala i’m sure u can guess it correctly ^_^ lagi mau tanya kan!!! hahahaha

      • haniclover 10:01 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hehhehheheh..okay then…actually no need to guess…i answered it the moment i finished reading your comment…heheheh

        • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 10:03 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink

          u got it wrong! hahaha

        • haniclover 10:20 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink

          hey…are you sure????

        • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 10:24 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink

          it depends on who’s actually in your mind haha

        • haniclover 10:26 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink

          heyyyyy..don’t be so tricky… ^^

        • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 10:28 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink

          haha ok. tell me who r in your mind right now 😛

        • haniclover 10:33 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink

          red

        • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 10:46 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink

          wakakakakakaka you’re so funny. i love u.

        • haniclover 10:58 pm on April 19, 2012 Permalink

          hahaha…u love ma bcause i was right kn?????

        • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 12:15 am on April 20, 2012 Permalink

          hmm.. i don’t know. just don’t wanna dissapoint you. Hehe

        • haniclover 12:19 am on April 20, 2012 Permalink

          hey….dun say that

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 12:32 am on April 20, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      disappoint la. haha i spelled it wrong ;P

  • le joufflu et big dream 1:43 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink | Reply
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    my first day of exam 

    today is when my first day of my final exam started.the first subject is of course, english..i love english very much. yes, i do.but when it comes to 50 questions (objective plak tuh),i do get annoyed. have to finish answering within 2 hours. we started at 9 am till 11 am.but i have finished it at 9.50 am…so,what bout leaving the exam room earlier???i do question myself..while i’m questioning myself,at least 5 students have left the room.

    …….then,thinking back,i don’t want other people to say that “wooaaa..berlagak siap awal la tuh”.then,i stayed till the end.whatever it is,my biggest problem during this exam is that i’m having flu throughout the morning and to make it worse,i didn’t even budge to bring tissue or handkerchief with me….argh…i’m so…..angry with myself…

    my seat number is 95.actually,i knew that i’ll be in the same room as this one senior that..i kinda like..just that i’m a fan of him.he’s one of malaysian representative for x-games…he did bicycle stunts and stuff..yet,he’s also one of annur committee member (geng surau lah kiranya) and president for PRD or pembimbing rakan dinamik for my matric.so…to sum it up,he’s kinda famous jgk la kan..

    AND GUESS WHAT??????

    he’s sitting beside me…i’m like so uncomfortable while answering all those whatever question…what if i suddenly fart????(having stomach ache during that time) and my runny nose even helping at all..o God..just help me…..and to make my heart beat faster,there’s also a guy sitting beside me..he’s just so-so tp even that, a girl couldn’t help to feel uncomfortable kn bila a guy is sitting beside her..tambah2,both left and right…and to top it up,there’s this guy..a hottie that also sat for exam in the same room as mine..so…

    I’M soooooooo UNCOMFORTABLE….

    what to do for next 4 days coming?????just help me

     
    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 2:37 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      wahaaaaa.. what a day! haha. i don’t know how it feels because there is no hot guy in my class. HAHA. and that senior of yours woaaaw 😉

      • haniclover 2:51 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hahaahahahah..segan kot..xtaula..nnti trganggu plak sy time nk jwb soalan nnti

        • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 3:00 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink

          ala jgn la mcm tu. eh seat dia x berubah ke? same person will be sitting beside you till the exam habis? oh no.

        • haniclover 3:05 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink

          yup…xbrubah…that’s why its kinda hate it -but-love it situation…aduhhhh

        • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 3:10 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink

          ahaaaa. just cherish the moment my girl!!!! 😉 you are so going to miss this one day! i have an invigilator that i like, an officer at exam dept, always time exam dia ada as a coordinator selalu tgk2 dia because he’s toooooooo handsome. haha. somehow it will be some kind of entertainment. xde la boring sgt kn 😉

        • haniclover 3:14 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink

          hahahaha…but because he’s the mosque committee, xkan sy nk jenguk2 dia plak kn???heheh..so..just bear with it la kn..cannot see but still can feel the presence…woooooo..hee

    • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 3:17 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink | Reply

      ha ah ye la. but ada satu hari tu kn i met this invigilator kt surau tgh jadi imam utk invi2 yang lain. wooow. ahaha. and ada one day tu jgk i met him tgh lipat lengan baju dia after ambik wudhu’. ohmy. rasa mcm nk join dia. apakah? haha eh blog awk ni public ke? kalau public haruslah sy delete komen ni nanti. buat malu je. HAHA

      • haniclover 9:34 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink | Reply

        hahahaha…comelnya..bleh jd bakal suami yg baik..heheh..i’m not sure…public kot…heheh…

        • ♥ fariza azrina ♥ 10:31 pm on April 17, 2012 Permalink

          haha tau takpe. dah la handsome. k bye i’m gonna delete all my comments nw. haha

        • haniclover 4:46 pm on April 18, 2012 Permalink

          hahahha…i dont even have many followers la..just 3 including you..no worries…and i dont even know the other 2..heheh(sorry)

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